


Hiding It

by Hoonta_Of_Fics



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempted Suicide, F/F, Other, Self-Harm, SuperCorp, supercorp children
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-26 03:05:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17737790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hoonta_Of_Fics/pseuds/Hoonta_Of_Fics
Summary: For the past year Lori Luthor-Danvers has been dealing with the worst kind of depression, she’s caught in the routine of cutting herself after school. She’s been hiding it from her parents, and not hanging with her friends as much to hide her scars. Fortunately for her, J’onn jones (Martian Manhunter) is always available for help.





	Hiding It

Lori Luthor-Danver’s subverted everyone’s expectations. In the worst possible way: She has no powers. 

For the past year - wow - a miserable year. She’s dealt with it. The pain in her head. The black barking dog, convincing her she’s not worth it. Not having her mother’s powers, not living to the mantle. Not being good enough. 

She’s lost count how many hours of sleep she’s lost. How many 4Am’s she’s stayed up to see. She’s sick of the pattern she’s fallen into. Going to school, coming home, putting off homework, going into the bathroom and removing a tile to get to her razor stash. How many time’s she’s looked at the stash, rolled up her sleeves, showing the various scars, and made another one. Afterwards, she’d always promised herself that she’d never do it again - yet she always does. She lets the blood drip into the toilet, as to leave no evidence - raise no concern. 

She hides away in her room most of the time. Not feeling like she can turn to her family, she seeks refuge in J’onn. 

J’onn’s personal office. DEO. 

‘Lori. What’s wrong?’ 

‘Can’t you just read my mind?’ 

‘Prefer not to. You have to tell me what’s wrong. It’s your privacy.’ 

She sits there in the uncomfortable silence. Fidgeting endlessly, looking off at the various alien souvenirs from his travels, Lori knows how to tell J’onn. She rolls up her sleeves, showing J’onn the various scars from the past several months. Some are deeper than others, longer but lighter. Her rolled up sleeves don’t go past her elbows, but J’onn - even without mind-reading her - knows that there's more. 

J’onn doesn’t say anything for a minute. Just sitting in the news. He’d always treated Lori like a niece, so this was a dagger to him. 

‘Lori...how….how long has this been going on?’ 

Lori can’t bring herself to respond, but hug herself, pulling her arms back in her hoodie and silently cry.

J’onn, who’s done this with the Danvers’ sisters’ when they’d fight, gets up to hug her. Without realizing, Lori collapses in his arms, he lowers them into a chair. She’s crying so much that she’s hiccuping at this point. 

‘I…*hic*....d-don’t…*hic*...know.’ 

J’onn doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t try to make her say anything he wants to hear, or making her lie, just letting her get it out. 

‘I won’t tell them.’ 

He knows she doesn’t want to get in trouble with her parents, as ridiculous as that. Sounds. He knows lori, and know’s she has the same heart of gold as Kara. In her mind, she doesn’t want to burden them. J’onn was there when Kara & Lena wanted to have Lori, and how much effort they put in to have her - and knows Lori is the last burden on them. This is what every teenager goes through, so he tries his best to understand her point of view. 

After a few more minutes of silent crying, Lori had enough air to finally speak again. Her voice is barely above a whisper. 

‘Thank you.’ 

Her face is pressed into the shoulder of his jacket, a big wet spot is now formed from Lori’s crying. 

‘What can I get you to drink?’ 

‘Huh?’ 

He gestures to the mini-fridge in the corner with his head. 

‘What do you like? Root beer? Water?’ 

‘Uh um…...got any Dr. Pepper?’ 

‘Plenty. It’s one of my favorites.’ 

‘That’d be great.’ 

She gets up off the chair to let J’onn get the drinks. 

‘Thank you. J’onn. Not just for the drink. But for the time, I know you’re busy. Also sorry for ruining your jacket.’ 

‘Oh that? Don’t worry. I got plenty.’ 

After handing her her drink, he opens his. 

‘Not that I’m complaining….but why the soda?’ 

‘Rehydration.’ 

‘Thank you. And thanks for not looking in my head, I didn’t realize I needed it.’ 

‘That’’s what I’m here for. You can stay if you’d like, but I’ve got to get back to work.’ 

‘Of course.’ 

J’onn swivels in his office chair to face his computer and go back to his work. 

With a heavy sigh, Lori mentally prepares herself for the story she’s about to tell J’onn. 

‘J’onn? I think I’m ready.’ 

J’onn gives her his undivided attention. 

‘I’ve been doing...this (she gestures to her arms, indicating her scars)..since the start of the new school year. I’ve been using razor’s if you’re wondering….’ 

‘Has school been bad? From what I’ve heard from a very proud mom is that you’re doing well.’ 

‘It’s been kicking my ass. It looks good, sure, but it’s kicking my ass. Always having to keep straight As, losing sleep and not having full meals isn’t helping either. I don’t know what I want to do with my Life, J’onn. *sigh* I’ve thought about a world without me.’ 

‘How long have you had those thoughts?’ 

‘Oh, I don’t know….a year? A year and a half? To be honest with ya J’onn, I don’t know.’ 

With hands folded, J’onn leans back in his chair, thinking how best to help his friend, without her hiding away even deeper inside herself. 

‘Lori. I hate to do this -‘ 

‘Please don’t tell them. I don’t want them to worry. Mom’s already supergirl and Lena’s busy running an international company. I can’t do that to them.’ 

It breaks J’onn’s heart to see his (who he considers) niece like this, but he knows it’s for the best. 

‘They will drop whatever they’re doing to help you Lori. They’ve spent so much to get you. You mean the world to them. Of course you won’t get in the way.’ 

Lori’s still crying, but with hope, she’s still fighting the depression, but she has hope now. 

‘Thanks J’onn. That helps.’ 

‘Talk to them and go from there.’ 

The two hug their goodbye and Lori leaves. 

————————————————————————————

J’onn waits for Lori to leave and drive away (as she recently got her license) 

(Above a whisper) ‘Kara, come in’ 

With a thundering crack through the sky, supergirl breaks the sound barrier to land on the balcony. She quickly changes into her civilian clothing. 

‘J’onn, thank you.’

‘Not a problem.’ 

‘Lena and I are so worried…..’ 

‘Did you clear out the your house of anything she might use?’ 

‘Right before I sped here, can you believe? She had a bag of razors under a loose bathroom tile. I threw that into the sun.’ 

‘I don’t know how to help her. I”m sorry.’ 

‘Don’t be. You helped as much as you could. I feel awful though.’

‘Why?’ 

‘She feels like she needs to avoid lena and I. That we’re too busy for her.’ 

‘I told her you’re not.’ 

‘I know. I know. But still….is that what I am? A workaholic?’ 

‘You’re supergirl. The nature of the world makes you one.’ 

Kara’s eyes drift to the ground, her eyes turn from concern to a determination that J’onn hasn’t seen from her. A protectiveness that only a mother has. 

‘Go talk to your daughter, before it’s too late.’ 

J’onn doesn’t need to ask, as he read her mind. Kara quickly leaves the building. As soon as she’s out, she takes off - breaking the sound barrier. 

National City Bridge. 

Lori walked alone, she parked her car a few miles back, enjoying the spring winds after months of the brutal winter’s National City experiences. 

She walked. And walked. And kept walking until the sun went down. She left her phone in her car, not wanting to be convinced otherwise of what she was about to do. She’d been waiting for the sun to go down, about 5 O’clock. Rush hour. The perfect time. No one would be able to stop and help her, everyone was too busy to stop the girl on the side of the road. 

Overlooking the massive river, the endless blue. It was almost a trance. Her eyes fixed on the river as her body climbed over the rails. 

She doesn’t remember letting go, but she does. She remembers the wind rushing past her as time slows down, perfect bliss. No stress of school, no mantle to live up to. Just the cool air rushing past her. She fails to notice the sound barrier being broken. 

She hits something hard, she thinks it’s the water, but she can breathe. Opening her eyes, she sees her in Supergirl’s arms. Supergirl is flying upside down, using herself as a bed for Lori. 

————————————————————————————

The two land at Lena’s office balcony, Lena’s right there for her daughter. To Lori’s surprise, neither of them said a word, neither of them scolded her for anything. No ‘why would you do this to yourself?’ None of the fears she had, but instead they just hugged her. Both of them silently cried. Feeling comfortable in her parent’s arms, she cries with them. But not out of sadness, but relief. Relief of support. This was going to be the fight of her life, but she had the best team to help her fight it. 

END


End file.
